Free Article: Recruiting Isn’t Just About the Athlete
When PrepDig Dakotas launched two years ago, my goal was simple: to help shine a brighter light on the incredible volleyball talent throughout North Dakota and South Dakota. Since then, I have watched our volleyball community explode. More athletes are gaining opportunities to play at the next level, more college coaches are discovering our region, and more families are starting a recruiting journey that looks very different than it did even just a few years ago.
The recruiting landscape is constantly evolving. With roster limits, the transfer portal, the 5-to-play-5 eligibility rule, and the continued growth of NIL, families today are going through a process that can be exciting one day and uncertain the next.
But in all our celebrations of commitments, there are often stories that go untold.
We see the pictures, the signing ceremonies, and the college announcements. What we don't always see are the years that came before them. The mornings. The late-night drives home from tournaments. The post-hard-weekend conversations. Families are making quiet sacrifices and not expecting any credit for it. The times when parents have to be the voice of encouragement, the sounding board, the chauffeur, the biggest believer, and occasionally the one who just sits with their child when things don't go as planned.
This platform has always celebrated athletes and put them in front of college coaches so they can earn every opportunity. But every athlete has a family that is on the journey with them. Parents aren't recruited, but they go through every high, every disappointment, every tough decision, and every memorable moment.
That's why I wanted this story to be different. I have had the privilege of telling the stories and player analyses of hundreds of athletes. This time I wanted to tell the story of the people who were silently cheering from the bleachers, the ones who made the sacrifices and believed in a dream long before anyone else could see it.
I asked Kristen Dinger if she would be willing to share her perspective, not as the mother of a Division I commit, but as a parent. Kristen and her husband, Derrick, were both collegiate athletes at Northern State University. Their son Hudson starts his baseball journey this fall at North Dakota State University; Baylor recently committed to the University of Utah, and their youngest daughter Breckyn is growing up with a front-row view of what this journey looks like.
Every family's story of finding a recruit is different, but the feelings are often similar. Hopefully, somewhere in Kristen's words, another parent finds reassurance, hope, or simply the comfort of knowing they're not walking this journey alone.
How involved were you in the recruiting process, and what worked best?
"I was very involved in the recruiting process. Baylor handled all of the outreach herself, but she kept me informed every step of the way. She used Productive Recruit to send emails to coaches, and it was a great tool for organizing and tracking her communications.
We used Hudl to create her highlight videos, which she included in all of her emails. She was consistent with her outreach, especially leading up to major tournament weekends, and she also contacted coaches before every camp she attended.
We purchased a premium University Athlete account, which I monitored regularly. The paid version provided valuable insights into which schools viewed and interacted with her profile. I kept a spreadsheet to track that activity and identify patterns in school engagement. This helped us focus our efforts on programs that were showing genuine interest and gave Baylor opportunities to build stronger connections with those coaches.
In addition, I spent a lot of time researching conferences, team records, Massey ratings, and other information to better understand the college volleyball landscape at all levels. This helped us make more informed decisions throughout the recruiting process."
How did you help your athlete handle rejection or periods of little communication?
"I believe one of Baylor's greatest strengths on the court is her "next ball" mentality, and she carried that into the recruiting process. If a coach didn't respond or a school wasn't interested, she was naturally disappointed in the moment, but she quickly shifted her focus to the next opportunity. Baylor maintained that mindset throughout the process. Recruiting is often unpredictable, so rather than focusing on the schools that weren't showing interest, we concentrated on the ones that were engaging and continued building those relationships. Her ability to stay positive and resilient and keep moving forward helped her navigate the inevitable periods of rejection and limited communication."
What was the most significant surprise about the recruiting process?
"The one thing we were not prepared for was how fast and intense June 15th ended up being. I felt like we were prepared because we had done all of our research, built as many connections as possible, and spent countless hours talking through different scenarios. We had a lot of "what-if" conversations leading up to the day and tried to anticipate as much as possible.
Our mentality was to gather information as it came to us and make decisions on the fly, so I felt like we were in a strong position. But when the clock hit 12:01 a.m., everything started moving much faster than we expected. Information, conversations, and opportunities came at us quickly, including things we weren't expecting.
What I was not prepared for was the emotions that came with making the decision. All of Baylor's hard work came together in such a short period of time, and while it was exciting, it was also overwhelming. She was making a decision that would have a big impact on her future, and the significance of that moment really hit us."
What do you wish someone had told you before this journey began?
"I wish someone had told me to get a paid University Athlete account sooner and to spend more time learning about the needs of different college programs. We never really thought about the fact that some programs didn't need a 2028 libero. Early on, we focused mostly on exposure and making connections, but we overlooked that not every program was recruiting a 2028 libero. As a result, some of her early recruiting efforts were directed toward schools that weren't even looking for her position and graduation year. We definitely got smarter as the process went along.
We worked closely with her club throughout the recruiting journey, and one of the biggest lessons we all learned was the value of playing in large national tournaments. Those events provide incredible exposure because so many college coaches attend and can evaluate athletes in person. VOLT did a great job scheduling a strong national tournament schedule, which gave all of our girls a lot of opportunities to play in front of coaches.
Another big advantage was having a recruiting coordinator. We worked with Susan Forbes, but VOLT also added that position this year, which was a huge benefit. A recruiting coordinator can help build relationships and communicate significantly with college coaches when NCAA recruiting rules limit direct communication with athletes. Having someone who understands the process and can help make those connections was incredibly valuable."
What would you do differently if you could go through the recruiting process again?
It's hard to say we would do anything differently because we truly believe Baylor is in the exact right place for her. In that regard, I wouldn't change anything, as even the things that didn't work out helped us learn something and ultimately led her to the right fit. Nothing ever felt like wasted time because we understood from the beginning that recruiting is a learning process, and we tried to take something positive away from every experience.
If I could change one thing, I would have cleared my schedule on June 15 and encouraged Baylor to start lining up her calls earlier in the day. She didn't want to miss a workout or volleyball practice, which shows her dedication, but in hindsight, that one day was unique, and starting calls earlier in the day may have given her time to talk to more colleges before making her decision."
How important were character, attitude, and work ethic in conversations with coaches?
"Character, attitude, and work ethic were extremely important to every college that was recruiting Baylor. What many families may not realize is that a lot of those conversations happen with coaches and recruiting coordinators long before June 15. Coaches can learn a lot by watching you compete—they can see your effort, body language, how you respond to adversity, and how you interact with teammates. But when it comes to character, they really do their homework. You can't fake character during a tournament; it's reflected in the choices you make day after day, especially when no one is watching. College coaches really value and protect their cultures, and they want to make sure that any athlete they bring into the program will not only contribute on the court but also have a positive impact on the team's culture and the people around them."
Was there a moment when you realized your child had found "their" school?
"Yes. Our last stop on Baylor's camp tour before June 15 was Utah. We didn't know much about the program at the time, but we had the opportunity to meet Head Coach Alyssa D'Errico the morning of camp. We talked for less than five minutes, but my husband and I both walked away incredibly impressed.
We spent the rest of the day exploring Salt Lake City and learning more about Coach D'Errico, Utah Volleyball, and the rest of the coaching staff. At one point, we listened to an interview Coach D'Errico gave after she was hired at Utah, and there was a moment where I literally got chills. What she said hit so close to home that I remember thinking, "This is it. This is where I want Baylor to be."
After Baylor committed, I was talking with her club coach, and she told me that during a phone conversation with Coach D'Errico, she knew right away that "they were going to love Baylor as much as I've loved Baylor." It felt like confirmation that Utah saw and valued the same things in Baylor that the people closest to her always had."
What did college coaches consistently say they were looking for beyond volleyball skills?
"Throughout the recruiting process, we heard many of the same words over and over again from college coaches: character, hustle, mindset, energy, communication, and coachability. Those qualities seemed to be just as important as volleyball skills when coaches evaluated potential recruits."
If you could give one piece of advice to every parent starting this journey, what would it be?
"Enjoy the process! I truly loved the recruiting journey. Baylor and I were very engaged throughout the entire process, and it was so much fun working together toward a shared goal. There were definitely stressful moments and plenty of unknowns, but some of my favorite memories with her came from volleyball tournaments, camp visits, and long conversations about schools. It's easy to get caught up in offers, rankings, and timelines, but don't forget to enjoy the experience for what it is—a unique opportunity to spend time with your child and help them reach their goals.
(Sorry, I have two pieces of advice.) I maintained two criteria for Baylor when she was choosing a college: first, go somewhere I can get to you easily; and second, go somewhere that truly wants you. The second one was non-negotiable for me.
At the end of the day, talent may get a coach's attention, but what matters most is that a program genuinely wants you. You want your child to be in a place where they feel valued, supported, and appreciated. When a coaching staff truly believes in your athlete, they are more likely to invest in their development, support them through challenges, and create an environment where they can thrive. Four years (now five) is a long time, and fit matters. I wanted Baylor to be somewhere she felt wanted from day one, and looking back, that was one of the best pieces of guidance we followed during the entire process."
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Eventually, recruitment ceases. So does childhood.
Celebrate the commitment, but don't rush the journey that got you there. One day the phone calls will end, the tournaments will be over, and the gym will be a memory. What you'll remember most won't be the rankings or the offers. It will be the laughter in the car after a long weekend, the conversations that only happened because of volleyball, and the privilege of watching your kid grow into who they were meant to be.
Thank you to every parent out there reading this. Thank you for believing when your athlete needed it most, for sacrificing when no one else saw, and for loving them through every victory, every setback, and every unknown.
~Theresa@prepdigdakotas
