Beyond the Game: Heartache Hits Home
The President's Day weekend is loaded with volleyball competition. This year, it was overpowered by empathy, compassion, and heartache.
Leslie Prather and Carrie McGraw were packed into their van with their two daughters, Rhyan and Kasey. The trip from Kentucky was to play in the Kansas City Triple Crown National Invitational Tournament. The two daughters were a part of the successful club Adidas KIVA 12-1's team. Unfortunately, the two mom's and their young girls did not make it. They were in a horrible accident that resulted in the passing of all four.
The tragic news spread quickly and everyone at the event felt the impact. The young, KIVA team continued with the event honoring the lost team and family members. The strength it must have took for those 12 year old's push on with the weekend is inconceivable.
As the games played out and the tragic story was broadcast, volleyball communities everywhere felt the heartache. Both mothers, Leslie and Carrie, were incredible Division 1 volleyball players themselves before coaching. It is agonizing to imagine the pain of those close to the families and team. Road trips to tournaments are mandatory when you have a loved one on a club team of any sport. All of a sudden, putting yourself "in their shoes" became too painful to imagine.
The heartache of this accident has gone viral. I first learned of the story when a fellow Minnesota parent, who's daughter plays on MN Select, posted on Facebook. His concise description of weekend's event touched me deeply.
Dustin Reeder's account of the "most moving athletic experience of his life":
Hayden and her Minnesota Select VBC crew have completely out performed all expectations in Kansas City going 4-2 against the best competition the country has to offer. A few more made serves, and a few less balls in the net and they would have been undefeated, but none of that mattered today.
After arriving on Friday we learned of a horrible accident involving two 12 year old girls and their moms who were on their way from Kentucky (KIVA) to compete against us and 16 other 12U teams from around the country. Off on a cross country trip to do something they love with their friends. They were hit head on by a truck and killed at the scene.
The KIVA girls decided to play the tournament in honor of their friends and won their pool going 3-0 on Friday. We went 2-1 in our separate pool yesterday. Today we landed in the same pool. Our first match we lost 25-20, 20-25 and 14-16 to the team that won the national championship last year. It was the most incredible display of athleticism that I’ve ever seen out of 12 year olds. Our second match we played the KIVA team in mourning and won 25-16, 19-25, and 15-12. It was another incredible match.
During the KIVA match I noticed some cards and flowers left for the team sitting in the two empty chairs left for their teammates and it just broke my heart. Over the course of the day team after team, and club after club kept coming to our court to bring flowers and hugs. By the end of the day the chairs that had started with just a few flowers were overflowing.
Every match KIVA played in the court was surrounded by teams and well wishers cheering, chanting, and lifting them up. In a pivotal match we needed them to lose in order to break the tie and allow us to go to the gold bracket of the tournament I looked over and our girls were standing with them chanting and cheering them right along. Full throatedly cheering against their best interest, making all of us very proud.
We ended up in a three way tie for first in the pool with three teams going 2-1. After the final pool match ended KIVA, the team from Indiana that went 2-1, and our girls all gathered in the court and held arms and wept. Coaches wept, players wept, referees wept, and parents wept. It was the most moving moment I’ve ever been a part of with sports.
Volleyball isn’t just volleyball. Sports aren’t just sports. Winning isn’t always scoring more points than the other team. Sometimes winning is rallying behind someone that needs a W much more than we do and letting them know that even though we are strangers that we’ve got their backs. KIVA ended up defeating us in a one set tie breaker sending our girls into silver bracket tomorrow.
But we won. Our girls learned a lesson in empathy and in the power of community and we had their backs.
For more on the story and lives of these women:
